Happy Friday, gang! Hope you've got a nice weekend planned. I've been enjoying a day off from doctor appointments. I so appreciate your outpouring of support in response to my posts yesterday. There weren't actually any new developments on the medical front, but it's the first time any doctor has said my melanoma was at Stage 4. But that was the case even before the brain surgery in April. Still, it is quite alarming to hear that. The main revelation from yesterday's appointment was the clarification of the purpose of each proposed cancer treatment and the realization that I would need more than just radiation to the brain and leg - possibly chemotherapy.
I appreciate the concern for my mental and emotional well-being in light of the seriousness of all of this, but I'm still my usual happy-camper self. Most of that is due to my faith in God, but also because after so many years of dealing with chronic illness, I've come to terms with the possibility that my health issues could take a sudden downturn and my time on Earth would be quickly coming to an end...
But that's a reality everyone faces - from a car accident to a Texas tornado, there's no guarantee that any of us will be here tomorrow. Of course, I have serious concerns about coping with a life-threatening disease that I'm repeatedly told is incurable, but I just refuse to pay any more of an emotional and mental price than I'm forced to. Just as I have since I was a kid, the first thing I'm going to ask myself when I wake up is "How can I make the most of today?"
Rather than define this battle with cancer as a burden, I view it as a challenge. Rather than be consumed with worry and fear, I'm driven by faith and determination. But as confident as I feel, I'm still approaching this with respectful humility, never forgetting that so many have fought similar battles with incredible courage and determination - but yet they didn't survive...
Of course, I wish I could just get on with life and not have to deal with this, but I still believe that God has a purpose for all of the long-suffering... that it is far too early to write my memoirs or begin formulating a eulogy... I'm ready to step back into the ring - and I don't plan on just making a token appearance. If necessary, I'll hang on the ropes a bit, but then I'm coming out swinging. I'm in it to win it. And God willing, I most definitely will!
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