- I believe each day is a gift from God, even those days when I feel too sick to do much of anything.
- I don't let things fester inside. I frequently take inventory of whatever hurt, anxiety, fear, disappointment, stress, etc. I might be feeling and work at determining what the root cause is. I then try to figure out what I can do about it, accepting what I can't change. I make sure not to feed that little monster that sometimes tries to turn a negative feeling into a condemning judgment on my self-worth.
- I take a moment to grieve the ongoing feelings of loss from the illness and try to reassure the kid inside that everything is okay.
- I focus on what I CAN do. I put my energy into getting excited about how I can make the most of my day and not into being angry because illness or some other adversity derailed my original plans.
- I continue to have big dreams and big plans, even though based on the past it might seem foolish. It might seem like I'm just setting myself up for disappointment by always making plans and setting goals that have been derailed a gazillion times before due to illness - but what I'm really doing is just giving myself a chance for success! Long ago, I decided that I'd rather dream and risk disappointment than not dream and GUARANTEE disappointment! I can deal with disappointment, but I can't deal with giving up!
- I've always believed that God has a purpose for everything that I've gone through. That even the long-suffering is part of my "training" for something bigger and better.
- Even on the roughest days, I still have the joy of the Holy Spirit in my heart.
- I'm careful not to get wrapped up in drama, anger, envy, jealousy or any emotions that will drag me down, however I don't let that keep me from having deep feelings of love, compassion, empathy, etc.
- I treat all of my emotions as valid. I don't run away from "negative" thoughts or emotions. I give them the attention that is warranted, but also I make sure they don't drive my mood. Trying to gloss over such emotions or just put them behind you will only cause stress and eventually depression.
- I try not to let my physical state drive my emotional state. Even when I'm feeling awful I'm usually still feeling happy. That throws a lot of people off, but hey, I'm a rebel!
- My "requirement" to be happy is simply that I'm alive. That might sound Pollyannish, but I've decided Pollyanna was pretty darn smart! Yes, I still feel some big voids in my life, such as not having a partner - but I'm not going to let that keep me from being happy right now.
- I'm a realist in an optimistic sort of way. From what I've observed the typical approach to being "realistic" is often just conceding your dreams, because they fell apart so many times in the past. It might not be "realistic" to dream about getting well - but yet it could happen! So often people get caught up in their fear of disappointment... "What if this doesn't work out?" to which I counter "What if it does work out?! What if this time you actually lose the weight?! Or have a medical breakthrough?! Or meet the love of your life?! Granted, you don't know that it will happen, but then again, you don't know that it won't!" I say, give your dreams at least a fighting chance!
Ok, gang, I hope this gives you some insight as to how I face life each day and I also hope that you might find something in here that helps you as well... :)